You know Simon Cowell. He is happily engaged to Lauren Silverman, and the couple are proud parents to a 12-year-old son named Eric.
Now, Lauren, 48, has opened up about the scandalous circumstances surrounding her pregnancy with Eric and why it was “one of the hardest times of [her] life.”
For some important context, Simon and Lauren first met in 2004 when Lauren was married to entrepreneur Andrew Silverman. Years later, in 2012, Simon and Lauren were first romantically linked — while she was still married to Andrew.
Simon’s lawyers initially denied the affair. However, things took a turn in 2013 when news broke that Lauren was pregnant with Simon’s child.
It was soon after this revelation that Lauren and her ex, Andrew, with whom she shares a now-20-year-old son named Adam, filed for divorce. Eric was born in February 2014, and Lauren and Simon have been together ever since.
Over the years, neither Simon nor Lauren has said much about the affair scandal. However, in a new interview on the Happy Mum podcast, Lauren said that she wishes she “could go back and take away the hurt and take away the pain that it caused” for her ex-husband and their son.
“There’s so many emotions that went with that, because it was the end of my marriage, obviously… I don’t wanna say I’m regretful, because I don’t regret anything, and everything happens in your life for a reason.[But] do I wish it had happened a different way, and that I could go back and change certain things? Of course I do,” she began. “It was just one of those moments where, like, I knew it was right, and I knew that that was what I wanted, and I knew that Simon was the person I wanted to spend my life with. However we got there, and however it happened, I just believe that it was meant to be.”
Looking back on the media scrutiny, Lauren said there was “a lot of emotion at the time,” which meant that she “didn’t get to lean into the joy” of being pregnant with Eric. “[I was] in fight or flight mode because there was so much interest in what was happening… I was just trying not to fall apart,” she said, making it clear that protecting her older son, Adam, was her top priority. “I felt like I was walking around with a scarlet letter everywhere I went because New York, even though it’s a big city, it’s really small, especially where I lived, which was the Upper East Side. It was just the way that people would look at me. I was on the cover of every magazine. There were news stories about it… It was awful.”
But, despite how hard it was for her at the time, Lauren has taken ownership of her mistakes. “I have nothing to complain about. I was the one who caused it. It’s almost like I deserved it,” she explained. “For me, I felt like, ‘OK, this has happened. I’m a big girl. I’ve got to suck it up, and I’ve got to just get on with it. Whatever’s coming at me, I deserve it. I’ll take it, and I’ll just keep my head down.’ And that’s what I did for a really long time.”
Lauren said that she’s finally “forgiven” herself for what happened, and now has a “very nice” relationship with her ex. “We are many years past that point,” she said.