One Harvard-trained journalist and parenting researcher is expanding on the recent eye-opening research study that was published by the LEGO Group. In the study, girls, as young as five-years-old, reported thinking that boys are taken more seriously than they are. According to Jennifer Breheny Wallace, “word choice” is the key to raising thriving self-confident girls.
“Boosting your kids’ confidence and creativity can be as simple as rethinking word choices and even the way you praise your child,” according to Wallace per a CNBC.com interview. “When children fear failing, it can hamper their willingness to explore and think outside the box. This impacts the key skill of creative confidence — which can carry into adulthood.”
So, how can you as a parent ensure that you are on the right track? Well, take a look at these four tips from Wallace for parents to ensure they’re raising highly confident girls.
Be mindful of word choices
As we all know, words definitely matter and have power. Be careful and intentional with words that you use to build your daughter’s self-esteem and confidence.
“We all fall into this trap,” Wallace says. “Language bias can reinforce stereotypes by associating certain qualities, behaviors, or career choices with a particular gender.”
So, if your daughter wants to be a race car driver, then let her know that she will be the coolest race car driver on the track!
Don’t harp on perfection; praise process instead
“Lots of kids feel the need to be perfect because of society, culture, or their own thoughts,” Wallace commented. “But, by just changing how we talk, grown-ups can ease that tension.”
Child psychologist Francine Zeltser adds that, “Praising your child’s effort — how hard they worked on a project or the extra hours they spent studying for a test — sends the message that a perfect result isn’t the only thing that matters. It can help your child stay motivated to keep working hard in the future, even if previous efforts yielded something flawed.”
Celebrate setbacks by adopting a growth mindset
By celebrating setbacks, you are teaching your child to view them as learning opportunities instead of gut-wrenching failures. By imploring this method, according to psychologists like Michele Borba, you are giving your child strength and confidence to take necessary risks to overcome obstacles instead of being defeated by them.
“Having a growth mindset means believing that you can get better at stuff by working hard and never giving up, instead of thinking you’re just born with certain skills,” Wallace said to CNBC.com. “When kids have this mindset, they’re more likely to bounce back from tough times, enjoy learning new things, and be up for trying out new stuff, even if it’s tricky.”
An added extra bonus would be to share past examples of mistakes that you as their parent have made and what you learned from them. This not only gives you all a bonding moment, but also lets them see that looking at mistakes as a learning opportunity can indeed be a good thing.
Introduce inspiring role models
Introduce children to women who are becoming or already are leaders in male-dominates fields. Let them see for themselves that girls can do the same job as men and be successful while doing it.
Put people on their radars such as Greta Gerwig, TIAA CEO Thasunda Brown Duckett, Ursula Burns, Rosalind Brewer, Karen Lynch, among others. Let them know that there is nothing stopping them from making it to the top too!
As we all know and Wallace reminds us that, “Kids pick up lessons best by watching what adults do.”
Photo: LEGO Girls Unstoppable; Adobe Stock Images; Pexels.com