Jackie Henderson has opened up about her “struggle to let go” of an ex in a recent episode of her podcast.
The radio host, known as ‘Jackie O’, went into detail about the efforts she has been making to heal from her heartbreak in the latest Her Best Life episode, titled ‘Getting over and ex and risqué sex’.
Jackie and her co-host, best friend Gemma O’Neill, were discussing the difficulty of moving on from past relationships when Gemma said, “Can I ask a question? I feel like you’re asking these questions because there’s still someone.”
“A little. Yeah. It’s obvious, isn’t it?” Jackie, 50, responded.
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The radio host wiped away tears as she shared the steps she has been trying to take to move on, particularly when her ex keeps reappearing.
Gemma reminded her, “That’s not what you deserve.”
Despite Jackie saying she was “over” the relationship, she fought back tears as she shared her fantasy that he was “my guy”.
“That’s my person,” she said she thinks in weaker moments.
Gemma then reminded her friend the man “didn’t show up for” her.
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“And if he’s not going to show up for you, and if he’s not going to be that consistent, safe, secure, loving man that you deserve, he doesn’t deserve you and any more of your thoughts,” she added.
Jackie admitted she is struggling to “completely let go” of him, adding that she “doesn’t know how”.
When Gemma told her this was possible by following the steps they’d just discussed, she responded by saying, “But I’m not in contact, nothing. I don’t look at social media, none of it.”
She stopped short of Gemma’s suggestions she block him, admitting the thought of doing this leaves her “terrified”.
It was then Jackie perfectly explained what most of us have struggled with at least once in our lives – trying to move on from someone you thought may be the one.
“It just feels like you’re in this weird, warped way of thinking. And I know I’ll look back and go, what was I doing? Why didn’t I just block him?” she said.
“But then I think when you do that, it’s like you’re admitting to yourself, ‘There is no more. There is no chance. There’s no chance now.’
“And I think we defer, sometimes, that acceptance, because the acceptance is the painful part. Accepting that this is not every going to be what you hoped it would be, or what you were promised it would be, that’s not coming back.
Jackie O’ Henderson’s career in photos
“But to accept that wholly is painful, and it’s like I don’t want to face the reality, but I think I have to.”
Jackie then shared that she is “staying off social media” and recently did a “30-day detox” but “two days into this detox of literally not being on there at all … suddenly I started thinking of him”.
“And I thought, why am I thinking of him so much at the moment? Where is this coming from?”
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She admits she turned to ChatGPT for advice, and it explained “because probably since that breakup, every time even a little moment of uncomfortable feeling of that breakup comes up, you would be reaching for your phone as a distraction. And so you might look at your phone for a dopamine hit”.
Jackie ended by saying she needs to “just go through the acceptance part”.
She said she feels blocking someone is “so immature” and a “cop out” but wondered if she might message him and explain why she was doing so.
“He wasn’t an arsehole. He wasn’t a user. He wasn’t a dick, you know?” she said.
Although Gemma did point out “he dangled a carrot for a good while there” and then “chose to pull it away”.
Their conversation ended with Jackie deciding to “give it a few more weeks” before she makes a choice on blocking him.
She called her struggle “hopium” because she is addicted to the “hope” they may end up together.
The pair ended the podcast by discussing an idea to open a rehabilitation centre “where women come, and it’s where they go to get rid of the love addiction that they have with someone”.
Jackie confessed it’s been “almost a year” since she last had sex at the beginning of the podcast episode.
She spoke about having joined dating app Hinge “almost two years ago” and meeting a man on the first day who has turned into a platonic friend.
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She also spoke of meeting “an Australian man” during a recent trip to Italy.
Back in 2018, Jackie confirmed her shock split from her British photographer husband Henderson after 18 years together. They had tied the knot back in 2003 and share daughter Kitty, 14.
She briefly dated tradie Jack Tyerman in 2023 and shared some details about their relationship in her memoir Jackie O: The Whole Truth in which she also chronicled her battle with addiction.
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